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Post by BEN CREWE on Jun 22, 2011 1:57:01 GMT -5
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"Can you really not hear the things that come out of your mouth?" Ben took a drink of his spiked juice, just to give himself a second. "Do you not hear the way that you put yourself in the passive, persecuted role every time you get half a chance? We're supposed to be past that now, remember? But you're half an hour back on land and giving me wounded innocence, then hiding behind 'just kidding'. It's passive aggressive, and we both oughta be more grown up than that."
Ben shrugged, looking at the fire because he was working on keeping from turning this into a fight. It probably wasn't going to work, but he gave it a shot. "I'll cop to having victimized you in the past. I've copped to it before and I'm not trying to pretend otherwise now. But either that's behind us or it's not, and if it's behind us I'm not the only one who's got to change the way they act. You say it's teasing, but when over and over it's some variation on how I'm pushing you into sex or you have to do what I say, it's not funny. It's trying to guilt me into behaving the way you want me to behave. So just say what you want, okay? Don't assume that whatever it is I'll refuse you or that you 'have' to do things or else I'll be mean. That's a fucked up kind of responsibility to push onto me." Was that all neutral enough? Probably not. He'd given it his best shot, though.
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Post by ALEJANDRO SANCHEZ on Jun 23, 2011 15:15:31 GMT -5
Alejandro was not playing the role of the victim. He just wasn’t rising up to fight about whatever the hell this was. He didn’t even understand how Ben was so riled up. “Are you this afraid of losing me?” He cocked his head to the side, honestly curious. He didn’t understand Ben…at all, it seemed. Alex laid on his back, looking at the stars. “I’m not trying to say you’re a bad guy or anything. Maybe it’s because we’ve mostly argued but this is how I am with everyone. I don’t have any hidden agendas; I tease even if it’s at a person’s weakness.”
Alex growled a bit under his breath, leaning up and cupping Ben’s face in his hands, giving him a perplexed frown, “It’s frustrating. I love you. You’re my mate. Do you understand how important that can be to a selkie when it’s a bond like this? I’m trying to make this work and act like myself at the same time without having to worry about you taking things the wrong way.” This whole argument was pointless, he almost wanted to laugh. “You tease me all the time. What is different? Why can’t I tease you? I love the sex. It’s my favorite part, but it doesn’t mean I can’t tease you about it too.” He tried cracking a weak smile, really upset. “I understand where you're coming from and how you see this as but... Give me the benefit of the doubt?”
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Post by BEN CREWE on Jun 30, 2011 23:18:33 GMT -5
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Ben let it go. For love or for tiredness or because he suspected that he wasn't at his most sane ever right at this moment. He didn't want to fight with Alex, not tonight of all nights, and so he just kissed his lover slow and lingering, letting the heat come when it would but not chasing after it.
"All right." His accent thickened, he always sounded like a right Manc yob when he tried to say anything emotional. "All right, let's just get you warmed up and then back to the hotel. Call down to room service for some fish for you," and more mixers to go with Ben's whiskey, "to tide you over until you can inflict your sushi on me tomorrow."
He smiled at Alex and ran a hand back through the selkie's damp and salt-stiffening hair. He was just so fucking beautiful, it wasn't something Ben was ever going to be able to tell him right. He didn't have the right words, the right mind to be able to do something simple like slide his thumb down Alex's cheek and tell him that he was the most gorgeous man he'd ever seen. Someday Alex might get a song. Maybe not. But for the moment he got a half-rough caress with the rasp of string calluses against the side of his throat, a cheap chenille throw bought just to give Alex something soft against his human skin when he had to come up to the air and an expressed willingness to sit there watching his boyfriend eat sushi. These were the tools Ben had with which to say that he was in love.
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Post by ALEJANDRO SANCHEZ on Jul 1, 2011 17:38:48 GMT -5
Relief settled into his stomach and Alejandro had to force himself not to sigh in relief when the gentle kiss was over. It wasn’t hot and heavy like many of their kisses. It had lost the desperate edge that Alex had gotten familiar with but somehow…that just made it all the sweeter. More intimate.
Alex’s skin still prickled with the remnants of cold. Despite the blanket he was freezing at the tips of his toes and fingers and couldn’t help but cuddle up as close to Ben as possible. Since Ben was relaxed again, Alex started to feel relaxed again too but shivered as he still remained chilled.
His nose crinkled in response to Ben touching his hair. It must be all disgusting and whatnot from the sea and being crusted with salt. An idea hit him and his smile widened, “Let’s have a warm bath too.” Alex really hoped that this time the hotel they were staying at had a bathtub. And one big enough to hold the both of them. It would be nice to be in the warm waters and it was as close as he was going to get to being deep in the sea with Ben by his side. The thought process behind it was a bit ridiculous but being clean again would also make him happy.
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Post by BEN CREWE on Jul 2, 2011 0:00:43 GMT -5
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Ben laughed but nodded. "It'll be a tight fit, but we can probably manage it." He dug in the pockets of his jacket until he found his car keys and handed them over to Alex. "Car's right under the street lamp," he nodded toward the parking lot nearest this stretch of beach. "There's a pair of sweats and a hoodie in the back, I didn't want 'em to get all sandy. Go get the heater started, I'll pack up here, and we'll go see about baths and room service?"
He wasn't particularly good at taking care of people. It wasn't anything he had a lot of experience with in his life, so he mostly just faked it. But he thought that maybe getting away from the smell and sound of the ocean would do Alex as much good as the hot bath would. They were in a decent hotel for this adventure, time enough to go back to the fleabags when they had to get back on the road. Assuming that Alex was actually going to tour with Ben, they hadn't entirely worked that out. Ben was trying to psyche himself up for the possibility of a split time sort of arrangement while Alex went and did his reporter...thing. He knew that he really ought to take Alex's job more seriously than that, but like many people who made it in an artistic field without ever having to starve for five or ten years first, he found the idea of a job that was just a job sort of...sordid. Unworthy.
At any rate, he didn't say any of that right then. Just leaned over and kissed the corner of Alex's mouth, tucked the blanket more firmly around him. "Go get warm. I'll get this packed up, douse the fire, be there in ten."
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Post by ALEJANDRO SANCHEZ on Jul 2, 2011 16:39:13 GMT -5
Alejandro was truly surprised. He knew that their affections were so much more than lust. That this was love…mutual love but he hadn’t expected Ben to start trying to spoil him or care for him in this particular way. It was a pleasant and happy surprise that made his toes curl. “All right.” He smiled brightly, nibbling at Ben’s lower lip in a teasing fashion as they parted briefly. The selkie made his way quickly to his lover’s car and set the heater on full blast, cuddling up in the seat.
He almost fell asleep but his mind was twisting and turning with thoughts of the future. Alex would be lying if he said he wasn’t stressed at least a little bit. The brunet was mostly excited and overjoyed at how this whole thing was wrapping up nice and neat but knew that things would start getting shaken up at some point. Ben and him would end up having fights again even if they were only little spats. Alex hated the fights but they both were a little feisty when it came to trying to get their way so it would inevitably happen.
A little prickle of cold ran down his spine and he made a face. Probably some of the cold air was circulating out and pushed every which way from the heat. Alex looked over at the analog clock and noticed that Ben wasn’t back yet. It had been at least fifteen minutes. There was a lot of stuff out there but Alex wanted to get the hell out of this place before he started getting anxious about not being in the ocean.
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Post by BEN CREWE on Jul 4, 2011 22:50:00 GMT -5
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Fifteen minutes. Twenty. Half an hour. Almost forty-five minutes and Ben finally turned up, carrying all the stuff that had been out at the beach and moving quickly, looking angry but not saying anything immediately except, "Let's get out of here."
It wasn't until he was in the truck and driving away from the beach that it could be seen that there was blood staining his bottom lip and his knuckles were abraded in a distinctive pattern. Catching Alex looking, Ben just shrugged irritably. "California. People are supposed to be open-minded here." And that was honestly all he figured had to be said about it. Ben hadn't lived his life in the oceans, he'd lived it in the world and on the road and as an openly-gay man who spent more of his time in red states than blue he accepted that every now and then he was going to take shit for it. He didn't have to love it, but he didn't have to whine about it either. This lot had been a little tougher than he might liked--they looked like 'bangers, and if they'd been a little older than the sixteen or seventeen that he figured they'd been they might have been real trouble. As it was he'd surprised the kid who'd finally gotten up the nerve to swing at him by being willing to kick him down into the smoldering remains of the sand-smothered fire, which had shocked the rest of them enough to let him leave.
The whole thing put a damper on his mood, but he was also trying to let it go. It was Alex's first night back, he'd left nd then come back to Ben and that had meaning. He wasn't going to let a bunch of dumbshit kids ruin that. At least he was going to try not to, if he could just shake off the mood it had left in its wake.
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Post by ALEJANDRO SANCHEZ on Jul 5, 2011 20:27:16 GMT -5
Alejandro bit his lower lip to keep from apologizing. He doubted that’s what Ben needed or even wanted to hear. Then he felt his insides get a little agitated. Alex hid it from his face but a fresh wave of anger raged through him. He wasn’t one for violence- in fact, he was an avid pacifist but the fact that someone had attacked his Ben, his mate…it made the hairs on his arm prickle up and he had to force down the growl that threatened to escape him. He was far shorter and smaller than Ben but if he had to fight, he could at least defend his lover’s honor adequately.
Instead, Alex waited until they hit a red light and grabbed one of Ben’s hands insistently. He kissed the knuckles gently and then let it go, so that he wouldn’t be in trouble once the light changed again. He offered Ben a smile, trying to be support without being overly mushy or ridiculous. Sometimes it was the simple behavior and way that were the best. Alex loved to shower Ben with words of affection and actual acts of affection but words just didn’t seem to cut it at the moment.
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